My benchmark for puzzling English was in Spain when looking at menus with a friend, finding a restaurant we could take Mum to later in the day. We wondered what “died of vegetables” would taste like. Luckily the menu was also in French, where Ratatouille turned out to be the answer! So some of the choices I have seen on menus here doesn’t surprise me, but might put me off. Unfortunately I can’t remember any specifically.

But my favourite odd English was in Phnom Penh, where I went to a performance of Khmer dance. Before the production started, a screen had a message to the audience, telling us that King Sihanouk had recently died and is lying in State, so that before the performance please would we stand and, to show our respect, observe a minutes slice for the King.

And then of course as we all know you must not touch exhibits in museums….